Part One - Prep - The four part wedding photographer.

     So shooting a wedding sounds like a lot of work, partly because it is. I break my clients wedding day down into four different sections which help me concentrate on the moments and not the entirety of the day at all times.  Included in this breakdown are some awesome tips which will help your clients fall in love with you.

First part: Prep

     This is where everyone is getting ready, getting prepped for the day. The brides maids are first on the docket, getting hair and make-up done. Mimosas and bagels are usually plenty if not sandwiches and cheese platters.  The details are still in the air, who's swinging by this place and picking up that or who has the keys to the hotel room and lots of fun hectic stuff.

    I like to use this time to hang out and get to know the bridesmaids better, after all we'll be spending the day together. I typically set up my laptop in a corner or somewhere out of the way (I'll talk about this more soon). I bring in my camera equipment and take a walk around the location. I usually give everyone a heads up that I'll be taking photos. Typically everyone will say to me that they don't have make up on and to wait, I usually shoot them down by telling them about how good the before and after is going to be. The ladies usually look just fine, in the case that they don't it's usually because they've had a wild night.     

   I like to ask how everyone knows the bride and typically parents are there too and will sometimes have fun and embarrassing stories to keep the mood light and fun.  I always accept food offered and you should too. Imagine if you made some awesome sandwiches or cookies and offered it to someone and they looked at it and then back at you and said no. I know we're not always in the mode for certain foods but this is a nice little gesture that they are giving you so run with it.  So if there are kids in the wedding which commonly they are then I suggest giving them a little bit of attention. I usually let them use my small mirror less camera for a little bit or hold my big camera if they are sitting down. Once I let them play with my camera they are usually more apt to give me those smiles later in the day.

    So I'm shooting candids of the the ladies getting ready and chatting. I'm taking photos of the kids that are running around or the mother who's making phone calls to make sure everyone is on their way or other details.  Once I have enough photos I go back to my laptop.  I download my current photos and pick through them for a few minutes.  Now I get to show the bride and bridesmaids and family some previews.  I'm showing them how awesome they look and once that happens everyone starts to relax a bit more because they now have the understanding that I kick ass with a camera. 

     So all this controlled chaos is happening and there are only so many photos you can take of everyone before it starts to feel invasive.  This is a great opportunity to get those wonderful detail shots. The dress is usually near by as well as shoes, flowers and the rings sometimes.  

     I'll take the shoes and dress somewhere more pleasing to the eye, a tree or more groomed room of the house or location. The rings I take macro shots of and the trick to never losing them is using my pinky finger, I'm not always the prettiest ring model but I've never lost any rings in my care. The flowers I typically place in a tree or on a stone wall or sometimes just a nice table in the backyard. The shoes I will sometimes pair with the dress and can be hung anywhere. 

    So the bridesmaids should be wrapping up with hair and make-up. The bride is always final when it comes to that stuff, we want her makeup and hair to be nice, fresh and ready for the big moment. So I usually get photos of the hair process which is done first and then make-up. I like close-up photos of lipstick being applied and eye liner being dressed on as well as photos of her hair. The hair dresser usually likes having these photos too as well as the make-up artist.  Now is the moment of truth, you need photos of the guys!!!

     So I've saved the guys section for last and theres a very good reason for it, it only takes them a few minutes to get ready. I usually save them for last or get to them first. I don't do the whole relaxed thing of sitting around and waiting for them. The guys aren't into the entire photo process sometimes so it's much easier to stage them. I'll have the guys get dressed and then they can always take off the clothes afterwards if time allows. 

     So here's a list of shots that I like to cover. I sit the groom down and have him get his shoes on, this of course is after he has his pants on. I have the groomsmen help each other with ties, bow ties, shirts and jackets. These allow for some tender moments between everyone.  I'll also do some of them joking around and then maybe some photos of them on their front steps if it's at their houses or some photos with mom and dad. This all happens very quick because it's all staged. My main focus is on the bride because it's her big day and her moms big day as well because she's been waiting for this for a long time. This is fairy tale time and we're part of it.

     So thats the first part of the photos, make sure to get photos of all the chaos too. Next part is the ceremony and i'll have that posted soon. 

The infamous Best Man's speech.

One of my favorite things about a wedding would be the best man speech. It's always the shining moment to throw your friend under the bus in front of all his friends and family. 

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   I didn't realize this till this past year how much fun it was to watch the best man get up and roast his best friend. Often I would get to watch the groom sink in his chair,  the bride bury her face in her hands and the parents give awkward smiles.  One of the big things that I never realize is how much emotion is poured into these speeches (the bridesmaids speech is equally potent).  I will say that the majority of the times I am glad I have a camera in front of my face, I often get teary eyed at weddings, either the vows or the speeches.

     So a few words of advice for the best man during his 3 minutes of fame.

1. Whatever you say can't be unheard. While it might be funny to throw your friend under the bus, don't screw him over royally. No mentioning of ex's, drug usage or how much porn he has on his computer. While you are trying to embarrass him a bit you don't want to make his family cringe. You also don't know if he's told his wife about the time he.... (you get the drift).

2. Keep it short.  If you have a mind blowing story that takes 4 minutes, sure. If you're just talking to hear your self talk, don't. Think SNL monologue, they get out the information that needs to be heard; they usually avoid rambling.   Try to keep it around 2-3 minutes and try to keep it funny or heartfelt.

3. Bonus points. A good speech at a wedding is usually because it's heartfelt, something we didn't know about the person and maybe incredibly insightful.  It's also great when you get some serious laughter out of that wedding crowd. Make sure to thank the ramies for coming and also do some name dropping of people in the crowd. (Seinfeld is funny because he involves us in his stories, things and people we can relate to) If your story just involves random people that no ones met from college or his work then it might seem a bit boring to everyone.

4. Format is everything.   Don't ramble, whatever you do don't ramble. So i'm going to list a simple writing format for your speech. (Excuse the words) The crap sandwich, okay very simple format this way.

You start off with the bread (something easy).

 Congrats to Mr. ******. I never thought I would see the day.. ect

(keep it at a minute or so). Now you can roast him a bit.  (the crap)

So not a lot of people know about this but ******* once thought that... (story begins). 

(keep that 1 to 2 minutes)

But you know, I couldn't believe that ******** met someone so perfect for him.

(The last piece of bread, now you pepper the

conclusion with lots of compliments about the bride and groom).

   So here's another way to do it. Start off with the roast right away, throw the friend off the bridge, destroy! But then at the end you say twice the amount of nice things or at least try to.

A big smile and long pause at the beginning of your speech while looking at the groom goes a long way. I know I have a few good friends who's secrets I'm holding onto for such a day. You want to make that groom sweat.

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5. Talking points. The main things to concentrate on would be the story, your speech. If you've never heard of this, it's simple. When you see David Letterman interviewing someone and he looks at cards every once and awhile, those are his talking points. While i'm sure he would love to have a mini wikipedia page printed out for every single guest that would be a little tiresome. Talking points are a few words or a sentence to help jog your memory.  

Your talking points for best and speech would look something like this.

a. Congratulations

b. How we became friends

c. Getting in trouble together

d. When you met your future bride

e. How happy he's been since meeting the wifey

f.  When he got in trouble with the wifey

g. Thank the families for raising two lovely people

h. What a beautiful wedding.. so far, we still haven't seen ****** and ****** dance

i. You've never seen two people so happy

(BTW, totally getting teary eyed even writing this. I've sat through a lot of speeches the past couple years and they've all been pretty awesome.)

6. Silver linings.  The silver lining would be for the groom, no matter how bad you've embarrassed him or tormented him in the past few minutes you have to remember one thing. He's going to get you back someday. He will have the same opportunity at his wedding or april foods or a random Tuesday, 

Give him hell but also don't forget to make him shine, this is his day after all. 

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